Editorial: Why A New Ghostbusters Can't Work

The internet is abuzz with hatred about the upcoming reboot. Find out how this guy feels.

"But what if I star
in it?"

There are quite a few reasons we don't need another Ghostbusters movie. Aside from today's internet controversy and commentary, there's another reason to be skeptical. It just can't work.

You're going to hear a lot of ranting and raving on the internet about how the people that don't want a female led cast are sexist. Not true. You're going to read how Hollywood has no quality left. Not true. And you're going to see the retro fanboy backlash against a movie that hasn't even been written yet, or maybe it has. The mass hysteria against this retread has already begun. From grotesque comments about the truly untalented Melissa McCarthy to fans claiming they'll engage in reprehensible acts of violence, the internet continues its downward spiral as people cry out in a rage over Hollywood's incessant need to remake every franchise property known to man.

In my humble opinion, this rehash is just not needed and cannot work for other reasons that what you're seeing splattered all over your Facebook feed. The original Ghostbusters brought something fresh and new to the screen that blended comedy, adventure, and hilarious scares into a film that was one of the comedic highlights of my youth. Note to reader: this idea does not rape my childhood nor does it lessen my experience with the original Ghostbusters movie. 

Since 1984, something has changed. Most modern comedies highlight gross out humor, over the top profanity, and are steadfast in their abundance of sexual innuendo. Typically, I don't take issue with this but it just can't work with Ghostbusters. Tell me, are we suddenly going to step back thirty years and get some of our cinematic innocence back? Probably not. A new Ghostbusters movie in this era will most likely be targeted towards adults, will be profane, and will share almost nothing in common with the originals other than name and the premise of a team hunting ghosts. I couldn't care less. The idea of annoying, under talented, comedic dolts trying to engage audiences in a Ghostbusters reboot filled with puke jokes, poop, and all other sorts of bodily fluids, just makes me angrier by the second. And you know that's what it'll be. There is no escaping.

"Ghostbuster's reboot complaint line.
How may we be of help?"

Ghostbusters relied on the perfect teaming of Ramis, Murray, Aykroyd, and Hudson. Three of these guys had worked together for years before bringing the ghost busting team to screens. There was a shared dynamic between them that played perfectly for audiences. They were friends on screen and they were creative partners behind the scenes. This translated to audiences and maintained a natural feeling of dialogue between them. To try and recreate that spark with lesser talented actors, male or female, is symbolic of laziness, is disrespectful to the original source material, and could possibly taint the way future fans might feel about the real Ghostbusters.

You cannot force camaraderie and you can't take a time machine back to see how they did it. But, you can give up and leave this thing alone already. Please stop before this bad idea goes on to make hundreds of million dollars at the cineplex.

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-CG