Cinematic Releases: Kirk Cameron's Saving Christmas

Andrew reviews the mind baffling Saving Christmas by former Growing Pains religious whack job, Kirk Cameron.

"The power of Santa compels you.
The power of Santa compels you!!!"
Christian evangelical Kirk Cameron’s Saving Christmas is probably the most confounding, peculiar and laughably preachy Christmas movie you could possibly make.  Where Linus van Pelt held his trusty security blanket close by as he dispelled materialist notions about the holiday in A Charlie Brown Christmas, Kirk Cameron takes that concept into outer space and grounds an entire “movie” around it.  I say “movie” because this barely fits the definition as such.  

It begins with Kirk Cameron sitting beside a Christmas tree and fireplace, looking directly into the camera as he proceeds to lecture us.  Through voice over narration, Mr. Cameron will continue his diatribe for the entirety of the movie until it ends on a freeze frame with him winking at the camera.  For those of you who thought the micro-budget Lifetime Christian dramas Fireproof and Courageous smelled of something strange, at least they resembled a film. 

Shot presumably in Mr. Cameron’s home with some of the worst cinematography ever projected in a movie theater, including shots that inexplicably fade in and out of focus with needless frame dropping, we follow Kirk Cameron with his brother-in-law out to a car where they sit and debate the true meaning of Christmas before returning inside to celebrate.  That’s the movie.  What’s in between are scenes of flashbacks to baby Jesus in a cave, bad CGI renderings of Romans slaughtering infants, and Saint Nicholas beating a scoffer within an inch of his life for not believing in the Lord our God.  Cameron pontificates on Christmas trees actually being the cross Jesus was crucified to and the decorations representing the Garden of Eden, meanwhile scoffers inside talk of “waging War on Christmas” with one of the oddest exchanges between two people in a film.  These two scoffers hide their mouths with their coffee mugs while their dialogue doesn’t even appear to be spoken by them.  Then we get a song and dance number where everyone inside the house dances to Gloria dubstep style, with rap and Cameron himself doing the worm.

"This movie is so STRANGE!!!!
Someone get me out of here!!!"
Saving Christmas is The Room of Christmas movies.  It is so inept, so strange and so withdrawn in terms of its perception of how human beings interact with each other in the real world it’s kind of fascinating.  Only someone truly dedicated with a singular vision and mad drive could make something anything like it.  Recently, Cameron’s film has become something of an internet meme when his film performed poorly with critics and the box office.  Cameron urged his followers to storm the gates of Rotten Tomatoes and boost the film’s ratings irrespective of whether or not Saving Christmas is actually any good.  The move backfired and detractors quick to bury the film voted it back down on Rotten Tomatoes and quickly catapulted it to the bottom spot on’s list as the #1 worst film of all time. 

Let me just say here, God bless him for giving me probably the most warped movie to hit the multiplex this year.  There aren’t enough drugs and alcohol in the world to make sense of the sincerely weird outlook on life Mr. Cameron’s Saving Christmas provides.

-Andrew Kotwicki