If you like naked chicks, scandalous nurse outfits, and
boobs or any combination of these things, then Nurse is the movie for you.
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| "Would you like those up sized?" |
It’s
billed as a sexy thriller/horror flick but the horrendous acting, major plot
holes and underwhelming gore keep it from being anything but a cheap thrill. I
have nothing against gratuitous nudity or sexual content but when t & a is
the only thing on the menu in a film I get bored. If I wanted to watch soft
core porn, I can turn on Cinemax. This movie literally has nothing going for it
except completely naked women (and some half naked guys).
Paz de la Huerta plays Abby Russell, a nurse who goes on
murderous rampages to kill philandering husbands and boyfriends. This could
have been an interesting premise if they would have taken it down a more
disturbing route, but instead they handle it in the most cliché way possible
and rely on plot holes and unbelievable situations to make it work.
Paz de la
Huerta delivers some of the worst acting I have ever seen in a movie and this
is no hyperbole. Every piece of dialogue she utters is so horribly stilted and
awkward that it almost makes the movie unwatchable. Luckily, she is naked most
of the time she is speaking so I’m sure that will overshadow how terrible it is
to some people.
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| "Look into my soulless eyes!" |
I love cheesy movies and most of those have less than
stellar acting, but they at least have some pizazz or hilarious moments. Nurse
is just generic in every way and tries to cover up its shortcomings with lots
of nudity. It looks like a mid-90’s basic cable made-for-TV movie and most of
the blood and gore is done digitally. The soundtrack is nothing to speak of and
it only has one interesting moment near the end of the film. It doesn’t make up
for how bad the rest of it is, but it was cool for those fleeting five
minutes.
I cannot reiterate enough how
bad this movie is and I love B movies to death. Avoid this unless you want an
excuse to look at boobs for an hour and twenty minutes. However, you can see
those for free on the internet.
-Review by Michelle Kisner