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| images courtesy Universal Picture |
After the massive worldwide box office success of The Fate of the Furious, F9 is here to let us know that this series has completely gone off the cliff. Abandoning any semblance of plot for a two tiered story that delves into the fictional Torreto legacy, audiences are expected to swallow hole the most ludicrous sequences this "saga" has ever committed to film. If you thought the spinoff Hobbs & Shaw was completely over the edge of reality, F9 is here to prove that nothing in this world makes sense any more. Science doesn't exist. And gravity is a fallacy. The death defying stunts become old hat as key characters turn to meta dialogue in an attempt to satiate a dying script that nearly lacks motivation or any hook whatsoever.
Despite the absolutely dreadful writing in all of these movies including layers upon layers of cheesy quotes about "family", they still rested firmly on the dynamic between the franchise's cast members. Even through the tragic loss of Paul Walker, the FF crew seemed tight knit and always seemed to know exactly how to play off of each other. With F9, all of that is sadly missing. Let's face it. These movies are truly guilty pleasures that rely on their audience setting realism aside for a fast paced ride. Taking all that into consideration, this one totally misses the mark. The wink and a nod is gone. There is no great interplay between what's left of the central cast. And without Jason Statham and Dwayne Johnson to carry much of the comedic weight, F9 falls flat on its face with a dying whimper.
Starting out of the gate with a rather impressive flashback that gives us some more background about Dominic and his long lost past, the movie quickly devolves into another mission to save the world from some high tech device that the baddies want to get their Kevlar covered mitts on. F9 spends much of its run time going back and forth between present and past as it attempts to recourse some of the existing mythology surrounding these characters. Fortunately, some of the flashback scenes really do echo the original few films in this series. We're given some amount of emotion, a bit of actual character development, and a reason for Dominic's love of cars. It's really when we're back in the now that F9 loses all of its luster.
As a long running apologetic supporter of the first several of these FF movies, this was a hard watch. Sure, there's something that keeps audiences coming back. The action sequences are dazzling, the sound is great in a properly equipped cinema, and the mix of practical effects and computer generated visuals is a nice blend. But, the apparent loss of understanding how to tell a story is where this latest entry loses the fight. After the absolute spectacle of The Fate of the Furious that saw Charlize Theron steal the spotlight, it's hard to watch her play second fiddle to a cookie cutter James Bond knock off villain and a nearly meritless John Cena. She's just too good for this mess of a movie.
Sure, go in with the brain turned off. But two and a half hours of this notoriously incoherent flick that abuses its audience with the same old bag of tricks may be enough to finally flick the off switch on this long running brand. Try to remember one thing. These started off about fast cars and an undercover cop. There's no putting the genie back in the bottle but they could stop making these any time now. The warranty has expired on The Fast and the Furious franchise.
-CG
