Visual Vengeance: Lycan Colony (2006) - Reviewed

Images courtesy of Visual Vengeance

One of the virtues (or vices depending on your viewpoint) of boutique labels dedicated to unearthing and rereleasing regional SOV (shot-on-video) horror films is you get a real sense of which do-it-yourself filmmakers cared deeply about quality and which ones couldn’t give a rat’s ass about the outcome of the finished product.  Nowhere is this more evident in writer-director-producer-composer-cinematographer-editor Rob Roy’s astoundingly inept, inane and borderline unwatchable Lycan Colony, rescued from the depths of mid-2000s DVD Hell by Wild Eye Releasing and distinctly SOV tailored label Visual Vengeance. 
 
A movie where its réalisateur displays a peculiar panache of incompetence in nearly every area, it is the straight-to-video equivalent of Animorphs if it were rendered on FMV full motion video on a Sega CD-ROM disc with green screen effects that make those in the videogame shooter Corpse Killer look polished by comparison.  You don’t watch this sort of thing for storytelling or anything other than slowly losing your mind to the inanities onscreen.  Its bad but Visual Vengeance has done a fabulous job with it.  Alas a film which somehow makes even less sense technically or narratively than Mad Mutilator or Devil Story actually exists.

 
Disgraced brain surgeon Dr. Daniel (Bill Sykes) shows up to work intoxicated one evening and inadvertently kills a patient on the operating table.  As punishment, he and his family are exiled to a small town in New Hampshire where the populace is comprised of shape-shifting werewolves, some of whom are good while most others are evil.  Soon our heroes are forced into the crossfire of an ongoing war between battling wolf tribes intent on overthrowing the human race, or something like that.  Soon werewolf attacks begin and characters fall in and out of warp zone portals inexplicably before a witch with a spider monkey appears to give viewers a back history on the werewolf tribes hastily rendered by something resembling an animation sequence.
 
Completely bizarre, incoherent, incomprehensible and more than a little crazy, Lycan Colony is the kind of Carl J. Sukenick SOV movie madness that could’ve only come from a rabid fanatic.  To give some context, Rob Roy (no not the Liam Neeson film) saw Balto and grew so obsessed with the film he tried meeting the film’s lead wolf voice actor Kevin Bacon and wound up being chased off the actor’s property by dogs.  Bare that in mind as possibly the weirdest werewolf film ever imagined more or less unfolds onscreen, if you can see what’s happening.  


Incompetently filmed and edited by Roy himself, aspect ratios and screen proportions change in between shots for no reason, going from vertically stretched to horizontally stretched before luckily accidentally happening on normal screen proportions.  With actors faces or heads being clipped off due to the director’s self-taught understanding of how digital cameras work and a green screen built in the director’s garage for special effects sequences that defy explanation, floating matte effects, terrible sound effects and cheap makeup, Lycan Colony is neither good nor all that watchable.
 
But that isn’t to say there can’t be some absurd ridiculous inane fun to be had from this full-motion-video looking movie distinctly made in the 2000s but with the feel of a late 1990s videogame.  Digital effects are used in ways never thought of before including but not limited to a floating tattoo that moves around the back of an actor’s neck, nonsensical uses of infrared vision, digital screen wobbling and a werewolf “transformation” that has to be seen to be believed.  Makeup effects themselves either consist of human figures painted in black with wolf claws and masks on or, in later scenes, a fully sewn somewhat mobile werewolf furry costumed character shows up. 
 
Trying to make any sense of this madness that could’ve only emerged from a homegrown “filmmaker” who come-Hell-or-high-water got his movie made and released locally in New Hampshire is an exercise in futility.  Trying to follow this film’s alternate plane of reality slightly resembling our own has the capacity to cause brain damage.  At a certain point I stopped caring about the plot and just kept seeing increasingly peculiar and strange technical and narrative choices being made.  Closer to Neil Breen than Tommy Wiseau with indescribably weird digitally rendered visuals, Lycan Colony is among the most fascinating bad movies ever conceived. 

 
A movie that doesn’t just form a question mark over your head but also pounds rusty nails into it so you can never quite shake this mind melting excursion, the folks at Visual Vengeance have gone above and beyond the call of duty with their special limited edition which includes poster art, a slipcover, reversible sleeve art, sticker set, a Lycan Colony car air freshener and best of all the complete Rifftrax version of the film for those who can’t get through the film without the need for comedians mocking it.  Among the worst films ever made (certainly the absolute worst werewolf film imaginable), Lycan Colony in the right mindset and group of people can be a real hoot.  Others hoping to be scared best beware of this utterly insane mind job.  You've been warned.

--Andrew Kotwicki